With the signing of the new anti-terrorism bill, it’s time to stop some of your secret activities before they become discovered by government secret activities.
Namely, your porn habit.
While psychologists state that Internet pornography is not dangerous(because they have their own habit), it is an enormous waste of time and bandwidth. No measure of quality can justify the downloading of a 150MB Clockwork Orgy video. It’s not just downloading porn, it’s also video piracy.
It’s illegal, it’s immoral and, quite frankly, two wrongs don’t make a right.
For the next four years, the government can label you a terrorist suspect and secretly check out your activities regardless of the fact that you are just a beer drinking dork whose biggest concern is the imbalance of hair on your ass.
If this sounds like you–and it probably does–it’s time to delete your stash. Or, upgrade your stash at the very least. Get rid of that amateur garbage. Get rid of anything that could be interpreted as anything beyond good old fashion, heterosexual fornication.
Above all, no more downloading. You can do it. With roving wiretaps, you have no business making your newfound terrorist status even worse.
Maybe it’s paranoid. Obviously, you are objecting vehemently to these suggestions. Maybe you have a point when you put that “Porn… it’s cheaper than dating” bumper sticker on the back of your car. Maybe the Federal government doesn’t care about your porn and probably would want you rendered politically inert and dysfunctional while believing that it isn’t really hurting you. Maybe you are right on all points.
That doesn’t mean they aren’t watching you. Delete it now.
